The Want is JUST the Start

It's been a while since I have given a glimpse to me and my world of defining the duality. I have abandoned the drive of love of life for the love of a man and as if the light extended beyond reason.... I decided to abandon love for a man for the love of me and the feeling complete understanding seemed to settle over me and now I smile from within. This is a true testimony to love in the rarest of forms. I as I stated in my profile am a creative soul who has over estimated the true worth of my love for the common goal of an artist. To evoke and touch the spirit of the heart and the means of positive to people. I have been on a long journey of finding the truth of life and I know a lot of people say that's no job. Yet really if you look closer at your television, listen intently to the lyrics of your favorite song, you will find that it is the purpose of a lot of the creative souls out there. I believe that if you to are an artist that you understand the journey in which I speak. It takes a different kind of person to be loud in the ways of quiet. Unique in the arms of conformity and clever with wit in the mind of the mundane. You would believe that no one person has the right to speak up and out loud and without the acceptance of the mass thought.  It is not easy embracing your wrongs and idolizing your rights. It's even harder to live with the scrutiny of the world's eyes. Yet there are so many that do it. In the quiet of their privacy, they may cry and feel the shocks of insecurity hoping that your view of them is the positive kind. Well I have been in that dim unlit room of uncertainty and will live their the majority of my life on earth. Yet the beaming sound of today I tried will viel many days and cross the threshold of radical rebellious soldier for the life of change and different. I want to talk about self branding and love of the common man and the journey of the ordinary leper. I want to hear about the you in the world that people are so quick to hide to avoid the vulnerability of truth and acceptance. The want is just the start. If we want to be more than we are, then who is to say that you can;t be that more, that better that success of your day dreams and waking fantasies. I can be mine and I will be, who wants to be on the road to better, to take a closer glimpse at the impossible. Separate you fro defeat and you get the same letters, the same order... you just stand between the two and be the star and fan of the combination of your self. embrace your power to believe first in yourself. Right after God, you are the only sure thing in this world for you. I am learning that with an open heart. Embrace love.... detest negative and I can't.

Inside the Light

How did I get to the moment when you were no longer just a part of the world that I was living in? The memory of our meeting, our talks, our walks in this experience of humanity so separate had somehow become so much intertwined. A friendship of constant understanding and individual similarity. Now it feels as though you are as essential as the oxygen needed to breath and live. I can't live in this type of love, this love that comes with risks and faith. This love that seems to have grown under the wings of God and sings a melody that is beyond the instruments I have been trained to play. You have created a village of followers of my emotions inside of me, and I am beginning to reek of your words, your mission and your journey. I should feel as though i have no longer been myself yet I feel more like me that I ever had. I am being born again in the life of which you have envisioned me and it has begun to empower me and I want to run away from you because we are not in love, I am not yours, you have not become the man to the women I seem to be evolving into. The fears of my youth now comforts of home as I begin to adapt to a new life. The pregnant silences are full of promise and future movement and the miracle born to our conversations, dances of invitation, and faith have made me a proud mother of love. A mother who has labored in the disguise of happy when it was nothing more than incomplete desire that was so well hidden, even my reflection had not yet been introduced. Yet now I see her moving from shadows in plain sight. Now the dark is so illuminated with light and I don't want to fight the urge to be near the chills that cover my skin when your words reinforce thoughts that have lived without a delivery for the entirety of my life. I was moving, an emotional zombie. Afraid of showing the passion that was so well tamed without the fuel to let it burn yet now I can no longer contain what is there, it has now sparked and is burning so bright. The internal light seems to lead me. God is breathing inside of me, a part of my daily steps. I love what is happening inside of me, it is giving me a glow that is recognized without notice, without a call, it is showing from a place that even I can't reach. You sit close to me and stay there while I am not looking, while I am not holding on to you. I didn't want to know the person that would ignite my flame, I didn't want the introduction for now I can no longer deny. I can no longer excuse the boundary that was just a patch of my fear. Now I must have the courage to choose to have faith and believe in the documented path that has been paved with love and care. I can't hide in my anger, for smiles continue to permeate the air around me, pulling me from slumber each day that I give myself and I wanted to go back. Just hide from the fact that now the risks are so much greater. You are my heartbeat, my walk, the steps each coming quicker to find the treasure of serenity and peace that are all just the offspring of love. I just don't know what to do now that I have made this turn. Pulled toward the pillar of my strength. I fall to my knees daily to God for the privilege of allowing our introduction.

Hold Me Hostage

What in the world was I thinking? So many say I was lost in my own dream, a fantasy of my own understanding and I think they should just stop talking about what I was... not dreaming or thinking but feeling. I am tired of living in this world's delivery of what ideas should be. The truth is ideas are unique. Just as each thought that we allow to enter our cortex and analogy. Yet alot of days we forget that feeling is only the first step. We feel it yet, do we accept that we were able to feel anything before it came, or is that something can not be defined and so immediately denied. I want to kick and yell, screaming for my individuality. Just because you can't see the hue of your decisions left to the days consequences. What makes you believe that I can't.

Yet it allows me to arrive again at my next thought. I am not ashamed of the consequences or even the lessons. what I am most ashamed of is that I kept not believing but receiving. For the belief was the relief. I had been rescued. The most desired pain of all is the pain of love that lives in the same joy of love as well. The vulnerability of emotionally romantic relationships is one of the most dangerous game that I have experienced. I am tired of running in circles and so now I begun to evaluate the activity.... I love unconditionally therefore your choices are your choices and I do not change based on the reciprocation of my actions in showing my love and not just saying it. The actions you take to show how you feel whether the love is the same or not is up to you. If I see that you are the most important of people in your world to the extinct of my pain, then what do I do? Where do I apply the difference in a way that leaves no unsatisfied emotions for myself.
I can not expect the same of those around me, however I have the power to hold myself hostage from any love crimes, where me as the victim finds no resolution in at least your words.

Answering Questions

This morning while the rest of the world sleeps I find myself with my earphones covering my ears and music taking me down a montage of emotional experiences that shaped the last 24 to 48 hours of my life and I am checking my timeline on Twitter when I realize that my days of Facebook have become less and I look to my timeline for the confirmation that it is filled with the things that make my heart open, my eyes widened and I realize that for the first time in social media, I am not just joining the crowd but creating my own collection of things that inspire me, touch me, arouse me, attract me and actually define who I am as a person. My Facebook is still me of course but I don't play games yet I allow app permission to favor the friends who are really people that I have crossed in my short life time and I realize that while that book that carries my face, it is my history, my love "the people" who have joined me and effected me and now a job does not have to be lost to lose the faces that shared lunch with me, or old classmates who also experienced learning and evolving with me. We may not trade phone calls or talk each day about the things that touch us but we can "like" an enlightened comment or experience with the news feed and that makes me see the good in all the ways to control us as people. I find that love is the fuel for all good, and with that understanding a rant of rejection has created a new portion of history and we say hey you know, I enjoyed this conversation, lets stay in touch as long as I don't deactivate and you can add me to my friends list. For Facebook has brought back families old loves, lost classmates and then I look at the people who tell me there movements, thoughts and I realize it is my own personal yearbook. My own trip down memory lane. Pictures appear that I thought have died with the original camera and memories of high school become vivid as old friends reminisce on times that we knew we would never forget. Facebook helped to coordinate my ten year reunion. It makes me smile so I still go by and say hi, and sometimes I am able to make a note. A moment where I need to purge the congestion of thoughts that sometimes try to overwhelm me. Then I can like my likes and dislike my not so likes.
Yet the reason for this blog was about Twitter. Twitter was a long awaited add on for me, to many alerts on my blackberry and hey people where tweeting about their toothbrushes. Yet earlier this year I gave in and tried again and now I love my twitter, I follow people of whom I admire and I am able to laugh at the antics of old friends, and I get to share my movement. Twitter is my heart and soul. It is my poetry and I realize like Dawson's Creek back in the tenth grade I have the second thing in my entire lifetime that I really do love. A guilty pleasure that somehow gets me through days. Rev Run always has words of wisdom. Fellow poets and great minds are right on point about aspects of life and then me. I fight the causes of my passions and without going to much into detail I can yell. YOUR WRONG... YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHO I AM OR WHAT YOUR SAYING.  Just enough characters to get it done and if you know me, you know I am long winded. So I am able to teach myself how to get to the point.  And like most days that I find myself up with the rising of the sun, screen flashing before me, my book growing by day, my confidence increasing,,, I see a tweet from a new person I have chosen to follow.
So In Response: thatwritingchic ThatWritingChic 

What are you inviting into your brand? What music influences you? What books do you read? Who do you follow? Who doyou RT?

5 minutes ago Favorite Retweet Reply

I am inviting positive and adaptability into my brand. I am going to be a movement, an energy of thought and love. I wake each day with the same thought. How can I love today? Who can I entertain, share my time with that will teach me something new, something different, something insanely mentally invigorating. I live for the moments of understanding and debate. I invite the ability to be a an avid learner. Using each day to instead of allowing the feeling of inadequacy and sadness about what I do not know, and what pains from naivety to allow me to lose focus, I will see it as a gift to place under the tree of my lifelong experience. I will be a passionate soldier for the bringing together of Men and Women and helping them to embrace the love in their hearts for another, which will also advocate the building of more families and the miracle of love. I will not allow people to take away from my individuality my ruff and ragged edges. Even my flaws will be used to demonstrate what I have forgotten to accept or tackle for the fear of falling victim of it's emotional toll. I will not change my behaviors do to the actions of others and I will also forgive. I invite the presentation of GOD in any manner in which I that day choose to present him, which will not only teach yet also learn. This will also result in me to making decisions that lessen the influence of my worldly surroundings and it's understanding. I choose to close doors of the negative forces of the devil, making room solely for God, Love, Community and growth which will allow me to evolve. I will be a writer, a poet, a common comedian and a daily cheerleader. I will no longer run from the ability to feel the emotion of others instead using it to do as I was assigned to do in this life and I will never shut up. My words, my voice, my selection and delivery of content is apart of my unique gift and I belong to an army of rebellious hearts made of GOD, loyalty, trust, kindness, togetherness and perseverance that bind them together creating armies of spiritual soldiers.

One of things that really influences me is myself. Not the person who is reflected in the glass, but the me that lives inside of my outer shell. The woman who insists that I embrace my two totally conflicting thought processes. The little girl who was told that her beauty was nothing more the breast encased in a shirt. The daughter who lived with a woman with stern words brazen confidence and tales of survival. The first year student who was taken to the new world of an HBCU in a place she was foreign to yet never let her fear debilitate her. I influence me, for I am made in the image of GOD. GOD is love, a miracle in human form.

 

People who write influence me. From a little girl, clean paper was a place of illumination, imagination and invention. My mother tells me that when there was  a clean piece of paper before I knew the concept of formulating the written word, my pens, pencils, crayons would sweep across the sheet hoping to create a documentation of who it was to be me. People who write are artists of language and have the ability to see inside of the frame , the shell. They can see beyond the seen to feel the unseen. Creating the place, the time, the journey for the common person to experience it along with those who were their inside of the experience itself. They can teach lessons with film, and be the therapy to hearts in songs. They can be the political activist in poems or they can be the members of God's clergy with spiritual enlightenment.

A friend in my life I met a couple of years ago influences me.... It's very seldom in this life that a person comes along to us individually that seems to speak the same language as we do. Yet they are the version of life that we did not know, experiencing different avenues and streets, exploring different homes but arriving at the same destination to the point of being your compatible opposite. He is the brilliance in my words, and his vision of me, is one of growth and a continued quest to be the best version of myself and that influences me to strive in my pursuit of my own happiness, completing goals, and living the dreams of my heart.

God influences me, for his vicious, ferocious and ever accepting love for us as people encourages me to be the type of person who not only lives for my heart, belief, but to allow my soul to experience this experience among humanity as a lesson of gratitude. For it must be so hard to watch as your children praise the acquisition of financial prowess, vigilant mistreatment of people for reason of difference and misconception. God has given us an innate guide yet we not only falter in our faith for the higher deity regardless of the name, yet we falter in our faith in ourselves to be victorious in overcoming obstacle. 

Books are the cornerstone of my world. The binding, the setting, the characters who emerge from the impression of those who author them. I read everything. I continue to read for each book that I pick up seems to be chosen just for me and I learn something each time. From fiction, to self help, romance, Science fiction, Erotica, Fantasy. Art imitates life and I feel from the depths of my most core, that art of all kinds is how God shows us the true meaning of life.

I follow writers, I follow motivators of positive thinking. I follow the essence of femininity...which I define as the heart of the womb. Women love, for we were created to nurture and embrace difference and teach tolerance. So If it's putting down quotes about relationships, love, friendship.

And I RT @thewritingchic, @damnlovetweets, @rafaelcasal, @damnyo, My friend Shayna... she is gritty, and loud. I love that. Of course... RevRun... almost daily and BishopTDJakes, I also RT myself, for sometimes I am quite clever.

My twitter is the true collaboration of who DualityDefined is.

   

In this Reality?

Recently, I have been told that I live in a fantasy land because I refuse to give into the belief of those around me, and I must say that is leaving me angry and erratic. I have no fear in this life anymore and I am really ready to move on to the things that mean the most to me. So I have decided that I am going to stop listening to the words of these people who know nothing and do nothing, They are treading water and living right along the shore and have done nothing that mean anything to the world or themselves. What hurts most is that a man, that I love so much has rebuked me as though I am the devil. Do you know they through water on me as they the water they bless should become holy. Drugs are leading their lives and I have partook but I have not lost myself and my words and I have not lost my understanding either.  Funny how someone can help you to find the beauty and find yourself can try to make you lose what you have found. Some days it's all right there in front of you, but what of the every days that is is all in front of you. I don;t want to be the person that disappoints my friends and family.Yet most of all i don't want to disappoint myself. In my reality I listen and follow GOD. He is my crutch. I own that. GOd is my best friend and he leads me and I give unto him my good and my bad, No days will i leave him. Even in my wrongs i give him my heart so that my wrongs will be less and my rights abundant.

In Love with My Child: Casey Anthony... Duality's Definition

Love is the most powerful of all human experiences. A wise person who I am not sure originated these words, have left a powerful beginning for me. "Love is a reason to live and an Excuse to die."  In my opinion that is saying that love gives life and take life. The experience of living is not and will never be about what we accomplished but what we have learned and applied as far as the experience of being human.
As a woman, I have thought of having children and while I have made it to the ripe age of 30, I find it hard to grasp the idea of hurting a child. Women have been giving a large responsibility and a beautiful gift of containing growth and progression of life. The miracle of a child is a benefit to the miracle of love itself.  It is so amazing that one a child is made of one stranger meeting another and if done right, embracing that total submission of faith and trust to build a whole brand new family comprised of that man and that woman. In a lifetime as short as mine I have beared the pain of many idividuals yearning for children and the opportunity to make life of the love that they share with another, yet lose the fight to make it happen. A miracle is only in the control of God, so therefore they spend days asking why and finding different approaches to engaging in that mirror.  Yet so many women who desire nothing more than stability or companionship for that time.... Lay down spreading the secret of the worth to men that 1. don't deserve or 2. don't intend of staying around regardless of the action so freely applied.
I am in sadden rage that Casey Anthony has been released into the world as if a child is nothing more than a cabbage patch kid she will not be giving her dead 3 year old daughter. I have been toying with the idea of going to law school and now it has been confirmed yet again that he system of releasing a woman who waited 30 days to even report the child missing. The state of a lawyer seems to be to fight for the individual, I AM setting out to fight for the truth whether defense or prosecution. There is no way my closing arguments would have a left a journey to the reasonable logic of freeing a woman who did not find it at all important to even act like she gave a "two shit" that her child was missing. Maybe there was a doubt to actual action applied. Fine! however she blantantly expressed her lack of desire to care for the miracle that she created. Regardless if you believe her to be innocent or not... Casey Anthony was a great example as to how the world for it's on kindness, show that kindness is applied in wrong activity. Caley that precious child may you watch us all fro m heaven and hold on to the fact my heart that no longer beats is for you to be the only child to die in vain if I can help it. Your home is already so comfortable I know.
I am so in love with child that i have not yet even concieved. Just the understanding that a man I love can not leave just his scent behind... but a whole new version of himself, His seed,
my dear dear child

You were already on file, Couldn't be?

I have acquired a very keen fascination with the power of the moon, stars, sun, water, earth and how we as people relate to those aspects of our earthly experience. A couple of months ago I was introduced to a book by author Gary Goldschiender with the title... The Secret Language of Birthdays. At first glance it was just a personality profile based on your sun sign, however I was so fascinated with the accuracy of the profile that I decided to read further. I have always been very much Gemini however I was born on the first day of the cusp so I am dynamically Taurus as well and Mr Gary. He had the goods it seemed. I went further and further into the understanding and the power and the documentation of the effect of the natural elements and placement of the stars on our personalities and the fruition of our desires. The more I learn the deeper my addiction to acquiring an understanding of how we are effected by the world around us. Our ancestors of times only told by books of history may not have had i Pods, or computer processing units, yet they had keen insight and paid very close attention to the details of the world around them. 
  We have all felt the difference of moods when the moon runs high and full. It seems that it is no coincidence. The moon, the tide of the water, the pull of it to your mental and physical stability. 
  My very inherent hubris nature demands that I research my understanding more and more. With self understanding I feel more empowered, more understood when I look into the mirror and I see into my own soul. Can't embrace the differences of others until you embrace the differences in your self. It's about owning the elements of self love. Loving myself has been the hardest of all things to do and I am very tired of running from it.  As a result, I today took a closer look at my moon sign. As it would seem all the things I do, are just in the portrait of my personality... that gives me a feeling of resolve and peace. We all know that we ultimately make our own decisions. The power of the drive behind those decisions is very important as well. 
  I have always said that I was a crazy button, triggering emotional chaotic activity. It's true. Finding that my over indulgent personality was already written sure did take alot of pressure from my drooping shoulders and latent intellectual mind. Even that is stated. The funniest part is that there are so many people who were born on the same day at the same time and while faces may change, and the names are labeled differently. Knowing that someone out there may feel almost identical to me, makes me feel like I belong to a special club. So all this emotional instability was written as well and after all that I just got to thinking. What if? Now I am only saying what if, for I have no concrete hypothesis and no valid factual documented convectional proof of this, somewhere in my heart I feel it so clearly to say it wasn't real would be a lifetime fight that I would stand for. I have this nutty idea that we all were predicted.... 

In the Middle of My Thoughts

Somewhere deep within the burrows of my heart I am breathing his smile, his essence. The entirety of who he is and what it is that he makes me feel. Alive, new, full of hope, and he is not even my man, but somehow when he is near I thrive. I am not just living, he gives me something to nurture to care for. I sometimes feel as though he is the reason I was born. The reason I have journeyed this far into doubt to produce astronomical amounts of faith. Is it one person? Is it divine? Definitely founded in love and defined by desire passion and adoration. Can the love you feel for someone else allow to just love yourself more.

Divulging my heart and soul seems fitting for my mood right now, so I will, whats the possibility of him reading of him seeing. We can talk about the dynamics of who he is, yet in some pursuit of emotional and spiritual therapy some type of freedom. Soooooo I am going to talk in rants, raves, and stuttering mumbles. I have already told the world the story and because I am sure my Psychiatrist on retainer, all have work today, and as they are my friends, I am going to give them a break. Besides how much do we ever really tell our Therapsit....  So it seems that I am quite afraid of actually getting what I want. I have been denying the fact to the world that a man loving me the way he would scares me, it also scares me how much I love this man. How much alike we are, how well we fit, how passionate we are. I love his greatest attributes, I love his most dire flaws. I love all of him. The core the the shell, the stem of his rose. As people I think sometimes humanity, this world has tainted us of the simplest of things. Robbed by greed, raped by anger, demoralized by the American dream. And truly inside I speak of God alot, so I will not deny you my sincerity... God is love, he lives within us, no bible is needed to guide you to him. To his praise, his blessing and your testimony. each trial we have is to pay the price of appreciation and those lessons have been lost to my ignorance and the gracious friend of self hate. Not in the ways of dynamic drama, yet in the ways of the heart. He has not settled down with me, have not asked for my hand, so i can not give him all of me... Can I? We have become so afraid of being hurt of being lost to pain, yet if it's God who has brought us together, then why would he show me love to tear it from my grasp, to handicap me with his gift of my soul. I have so much faith in what I know is our meant future, so much faith in what God showed me in our beginning. Sometimes things, situations and people are more than a reason, a season. This man is my lifetime, the part of me that was long before lost to world of hurt and an understanding of myself. So busy putting myself in the back to find a purpose in helpful resources. I do things to remind myself that he is not mine in the way that is comfortable to feel all these things for him. i want to give him the perfection he deserves, but why should I reveal her, what if nd how I got here. Yet he does and did yet not in the fashion I would have liked him to demonstrate. Yet last night caught in another finagle, a consequence of my emotional games, I revealed a little more to him. I stopped trying to prove my worth, it has already been on trial and acquitted of pretense and self mutilating thought. I just needed to have faith. For every fight we endure, we end up in the pillow case of events, situations or maybe even experiences that cause us to be face to face. We still don't leave one another, still listen, still love. In our own separate but very similar ways of expression. I told him, the only way I feel comfortable showing you the things you evoke in me is through tangible support. If I give him the entire breathing change that is for his benefit... not one he chose for me... So I just said it... i gotta feel like the winner sometimes... he then says why worry about something you already have.
 Even then I cringed and tried to divulge any further... To love him completely and have him return that love would be total and complete happiness.

The Second Glimpse: My Crazy For LOVE

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My heart speaks only

by A'Nya Lewis on Monday, September 6, 2010 at 3:25am

You live within me. I see us being the prototype. They will ask how do we do it? Was it always this way? We will answer God. We had no control and we didn't choose. One day I will say to you.... I love you. I love the man you are. I admire your courage, resilience and strength. I depend on your instincts and follow your lead. I bleed in preparation to bare your heirs. I work at your side, lay in your arms and nurture your soul. I will prepare your meals with love by my hands. I will support your dreams, and help you to build your wealth. I will lessen the load of the world with my scent, touch and execution. I will love you first spiritually allowing God into our union and having faith in God which is our love. I will trust the Holy Spirit and feelings that link us. I will share my body with you, creating a haven of desire that strengths the muscle of your heart and the emotion of it as well. I am to the exclusivity of you. I bare myself and trust you desires. I will not deny you our sensual private parties. I will not be afraid of your sexual fantasies. I will be your playground. I will surrender to the need for your embrace and weight. I will reveal my most intimate desires so that we create walls around our love, no one can break. I will wash your back and play in the darkness with you. I will not falter or take advantage of your devotion to me. I will cater to you, make home a sanctuary. I will tell you the things I might be embarrassed to say. I will trust that you will not laugh when I fall, but pick me up. Then I will tell you. I love you so very much. It has created a need to be near you. I need your embrace, I need your strength. I rely on your instincts and intelligence. I adore your sympathy to the next man. I boast of your talents. I am fierce in my possession. I will not share and dare anyone to try to infiltrate the alliance we have formed. I will deepen our bond with daily invocation of my emotions. I will stroke your ego and dedicate my days to your progress. I vow to love you even when days are hard. We will see obstacles that will do nothing but teach us humility and forgiveness. I deny all others for you. You are my king. You are irreplaceable. We are spiritually, emotionally, mentally and physically intertwined. We are best friends. We are family. We are the start of a new beginning. I want to be the woman who stands above the rest. I want to past all the tests. I will stand in the rain if it means a lifetime with minimal pain. I will give you my everything. I will not share myself with no other. I will be your angel and your whore. I look at you and my body screams. I look into your eyes and I don't need the presence of wine. You are my aphrodisiac. Your scent, the baritone in your voice. Even the way you walk creates puddles of desire, calling you to complete me with your anatomy. I relish in the truth that no one else gets I what I have. You spill your seeds into me and hold them tight. I submit and commit with a full heart. It will take me a lifetime to really express the things I feel. I promise to each day say how much love I feel. I will tell you my disappointments and share my triumphs. I want to live with you. Grow and learn. I want to ease the pain. If I can't then I must feel it to, so you are not alone. I will protect what is mine at all costs. I will deny you nothing that doesn't hurt us or our progress. I will stop at nothing to create a home filled with love. I will tend to our home. I will share myself without hesitation and will not put another human before you. Today before ouR future manifest I tell you my heart. I see it clearly, we have to prepare. You know we and we have a lot of love to nurture. We will have to pray and follow our hearts. We will have faith and not be blindsided by fear. I am being prepared to love fiercely and with equovacations. Love is God so the devil will appear. We must hold to his hand and run to his shelter. We will keep our secrets and succumb to only each other. I will laugh with you, play with you, grow with you, learn with you, mature with you, build with you. I will submit to you, commit to you. I will cater to you. I will wait for your command, I will honor your demands. I will share with you, dare with you. I will take this leap with you. I will care for you, I will make love to you, I will fuck you to. I will be your playground and keep the adventures of desire to be shared with only you. I will take care of you. I will wait for you. I will acknowledge your changes and supply you with demonstrations of feelings not expressed by words. I will be pretty for you and wear things you like. I will wash your back and support your choices. I will never defile your character or create misunderstanding. I will be the person on whom you can always depend. Tell me the things you desire and I will not let the fire die. I will only ask why to further understand, not to undermine. I will doctor your wounds and heal your soul. I will allow you complete admittance to my world. I will allow you to conqueR me, bringing us together to create one.
In my heart these are things that begin to fester. Just your presence entices me, excites and devours me. My love forces me to give in to my temptation. Even in my anger my body will tell no lies. It doesn't know frustration and summation. It sees only in red. It welcomes you. It was created for you. Our love is my priority, because it is the human mantifesation of God. It is a miracle designed for all, no love is ever the same. Now, I want to take your last name.

What of We?

Didn't you see me coming, this image of you just in contrast, in where your out, emotion to your logic, its not symbolic. When you ask, I will bury my mask, gladly take your name with no shame... our love will be so bomb they will hang our certificate of marriage in the hall of fame. we have always been epic, no wonder you wear the hat of a skeptic. This love will persevere, hear lies no fear. Will be kind, start in the heart and be defined in the mind, will outlive this life, and go on for many lifetimes, be the beginning of rapped rhymes, be legendary... not the cherry but the sundae, A'Nya Khadija Monea is the name of your future wife... try it on... sounds good... yours the only hood.... i bang, only for you will i twerk this thang.... you have made my heart sang. didn't you see me coming or did you feel me leave, when I thought to snatch out another woman's weave for trying to infiltrate the kingdom i have begun to build, didn't she the sign on your heart that said yield to the woman who stands at my side, the one in which you confide. Was she blind, or did she think the same as I that you were a priceless find. It may not be today or tomorrow that we wed, and she may see your bed, your heart is already taken, let it not be mistaken for something that we as mortals can choose, try to hard and you will be singing the blues, give it to God and he will lead you to she who is your completion, i know it sounds as if my intention is selfish, and maybe it is so, for I already know what you have not yet accepted. although our love has been subjected to rain, and knows pain. It means not we are not meant to be, but that we must appreciate that he has made us a we. Yet i don't worry for I have faith, for only he that gives can taketh away. What he brought together can no man divide.... and it also can not be denied. What of we can't you see? Did i hurt you on our journey or did the past give you cause to pause and deny that which will last. What of we? if not extraordinary.